Have you ever heard the old saying, “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer?” Well, plot twist. Sometimes, our friends can turn out to be our biggest enemies.

We’ve all experienced it—the subtle digs, the backhanded compliments, the passive-aggressive behavior. It’s the crab mentality, a toxic mindset that keeps us trapped, where everyone keeps pulling each other down. But why do we do it? And how can we break free from this destructive cycle?

Let’s find out all about the crab mentality in this blog.

What Is the Crab Mentality?

It all started when a fisherman was watching a bucket full of crabs as he sat on the dock. One crab, stronger than the rest, started to climb the side of the bucket. It was almost at the top, ready to escape, when another crab reached out and pulled it back down. 

Just when another crab began its own escape attempt, another one would grab its legs and drag it down. And well, the pattern kept repeating. Comparatively, when a single crab was placed alone in a bucket, it effortlessly climbed out and escaped. 

It turns out that this phenomenon is not only limited to crabs. In human psychology, we call it “The Crab Mentality,” which influences people’s thoughts, actions, and behaviors in various situations. It is usually driven by jealousy, insecurity, or a desire to maintain the status quo. 

Are You Trapped in a Crab Bucket?

The solution begins with identifying the problem. So, have you ever felt like you are trapped in a bucket, struggling to get out, only to be pulled back down by others? 

I clearly remember there was a time when I was feeling quite ambitious. I was planning to leave my comfortable corporate job and make my way into entrepreneurship. But as I shared my thoughts with a colleague, I was met with discouragement and cynicism. “You’re crazy,” they said. “Why would you risk everything for something so uncertain?”

Initially, their negativity stung. I was unable to process why someone would want to hold me back. Just, why? Only to realize that their behavior was coming from a place of fear and insecurity. They were acting like a crab that tried to pull me down whenever I tried to climb higher. 

It is important to recognize the signs of the crab mentality and take steps to protect yourself from its negative influence. In my case, the signs were negative comments and criticism. 

Be aware, a crab mentality can show up as follows:

• You may notice people actively trying to sabotage your work or projects, spreading rumors, or withholding information. 

• People may constantly criticize your ideas, efforts, or achievements. 

• You may sense a feeling of jealousy or resentment from others, especially when you achieve success. 

• Your accomplishments may be downplayed or dismissed, and your contributions may be ignored. 

Crab mentality is not always directed at us. Sometimes, we might be the ones unintentionally pulling others down. Ask yourself the following questions to find out if you are exhibiting a crab mentality:

• Do you feel a sense of envy or resentment when someone else achieves something?

• Do you find yourself making snide comments, spreading rumors, or undermining others’ work?

• Do you tend to highlight other people’s mistakes while ignoring their successes?

• Do you shy away from challenges and opportunities for growth due to a fear of judgment?

If you recognize these patterns in yourself, do not worry, it is never too late to take action in order to change your behavior. 

What Leads to Crab Mentality?

According to Stanford psychologist, Carol Dweck, people with a fixed mindset believe that their qualities, like intelligence and creativity, cannot be improved. This belief often leads them to avoid challenges, give up easily, and feel threatened by the success of others. Rather than striving for growth, they prefer to maintain the status quo. This is exactly why they pull others down to compensate for their own perceived limitations. 

Crab mentality is simply an aftermath of a fixed mindset. Individuals with this mindset are unwilling to expand their thinking or challenge their self-imposed limitations. They may feel dissatisfied with their current circumstances but lack the motivation or belief in their ability to change them. 

Some other psychological factors involved are:

Insecurity and Envy

When people feel insecure about their own abilities or position, they may become jealous of other’s success. To cope with these negative emotions, they may try to bring others down to their level.

Fear of the Unknown

Change and success can be scary and people may fear the unknown. Pulling others down can be a way to maintain the status quo and avoid the discomfort of change. 

Lack of Empathy

People with a crab mentality may lack the ability to empathize with others. They may not understand or care about the feelings of those they are trying to harm.

People caught in the crab mentality often live by the motto, “If I can’t have it, neither can you.” This mindset can unintentionally come in the way of progress by keeping both the individual and those around them trapped. As James Clear suggests in Atomic Habits:

“Environment is the invisible hand that shapes human behavior.”

James Clear

Through all, it is important to remember that the crab mentality is a learned behavior. By understanding the underlying causes, we can work to overcome them and create a more supportive and positive environment around us. 

Breaking Free From the Crab Mentality as an Instigator

If you find yourself sabotaging others’ success, it’s time to rethink your mindset. You might be caught in a scarcity mindset—a belief that there’s not enough to go around. This can lead to jealousy, resentment, and a desire to pull others down.

To break free from this negative pattern, try adopting an abundance mindset. Instead of seeing others’ success as a threat, view it as an inspiration. Remember, there’s enough success for everyone. By supporting and uplifting others, you’ll not only improve your relationships but also boost your own happiness and well-being.

Here are some tips to help you shift your perspective:

Lift Others Up

Instead of being the one holding others back, be the one who lifts them up. Focus on giving and serving others. As Gandhi wisely said, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” So, let’s shift our focus from taking to giving, from pulling down to pushing up.

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Focus on your own progress. Define your own definition of success, write it down, work hard, and track your journey. Visualizing your growth can be a powerful motivator.

Don’t Use “I’m Jealous” Statements

Replace “I’m jealous” with positive affirmations like “I’m proud of you” or “I’m happy for you.” Jealousy can breed negative emotions, while positive affirmations can bring joy and fulfillment. Remember, genuine happiness for others’ success can enrich your own life.

No More Judgement

Instead of judging others, see their success as an inspiration. You can choose to be negative by focusing on flaws and luck. Or, you can be compassionate by recognizing the hard work and dedication behind their achievements. Your perspective shapes your response.

Breaking Free from the Crab Mentality as a Victim

“If you attach to the negative behavior of others it brings you down to their level”

Guru Singh

Negative and small-minded people can be draining and discouraging. They often avoid taking responsibility for their lives, preferring to complain instead. To break free from this negativity, surround yourself with inspiring and supportive people.

Join a community that uplifts you and encourages you to pursue your passions. 

Find people who will help you step into your full potential and support your journey. 

Seek out those who will focus on your strengths, quiet your inner critic, and lift you up, rather than pulling you down.

You Can Do It!

Luckily, we are not crabs. We are humans. We have the power to think critically and break free from the constraints of a crab mentality. While it may be challenging to overcome obstacles and negativity, it is certainly possible. 

If you’re content with staying within your comfort zone, that’s your choice. But if you’re an ambitious individual seeking a better future, start taking steps towards your goals. Through persistent effort and sacrifice, you can develop the strength and skills needed to soar.

Once you break free from limitations, a world of possibilities awaits!